The most common way that people try to stop emotional eating is by attempting to replace emotional eating with another coping mechanism (e.g. “call a friend” or “take a warm bath” instead).

However, this “replacement” technique usually backfires…because it triggers diet mentality around food…which makes us want to eat more in the long run, not less. 

Sitting-on-your-hands-trying-not-to-eat is a surefire way to feel DEPRIVED around—which we, as human animals, are biologically designed to rebel against. 

In other words, when we try to pick up a coping mechanism for the purpose of controlling or limiting food—we can easily end up falling into diet-binge cycling behaviors…which is a way bigger problem than a little comfort-eating ever could be.

Emotional eating—or eating to soothe feelings—is a far lesser problem than bingeing your face off because you can’t take one more second trying to “hold yourself back” from eating what you really want. 

This is one of the biggest points of confusion for folks dealing with emotional eating—90% of my clients who think “emotional eating” is their big problem realize very quickly that what they’re actually dealing with is a diet-binge cycling—an entirely different issue altogether. More on this here.

So what’s the solution? Get rid of the word “instead.”

Practice new coping mechanisms and diversify your self-care strategies without putting pressure on yourself “not eat” over something. 

When we practice ADDING IN coping mechanisms (rather than taking out food), emotional eating essentially gets “crowded out” by other coping mechanisms without triggering diet-binge cycling behaviors.

Of course, if you think you may be struggling with deprivation mindset around food (i.e. you feel like you’re constantly having to control your food at all times and are terrified of ‘falling off the wagon’), it’s probably time to address your diet-binge cycling patterns–which is an entirely different issue. Learn more about that recovery process here.

Like this post? Check out my free video training series and end the diet-binge cycle once and for all. 

Today I want to talk about the last diet I ever went on before I actually threw in the towel on dieting for real, and that was:

The “New Age Thinking Will Make Me Thin” Diet. 

Sometimes this diet goes by other names, like…

The “Spiritual Fulfillment Makes You Thin” Diet
The “Positive Thinking Makes You Thin” Diet
The “Body Acceptance Makes You Thin” Diet
The “Meditating, Writing In Your Journal, or Healing Your Relationship With Your Mom All Make You Thin” Diet

Or my personal favorite…The “When You Stop Trying To Lose Weight, You’ll Lose Weight” Diet.

Right…because the Universe is an evil genius and is actively trying to fuck with you.

I say, when you stop trying to lose weight you’ll just be happier and whatever weight you’re probably meant to be, but that’s another post for another time. 

While I do believe that healing your relationship with your mother, working towards more positive thinking, and/or making peace with your body are all probably good ideas whether you lose weight or not,

I’m deeply concerned that the weight loss motive and messaging of this “diet” keeps folks trapped in an oppressive system wherein true freedom around food and weight is shallow at best, and impossible for most. 

I worry this fantasy, that we can “have our self-love cake and control our weight too,” keeps women from fully enjoying true, honest, body acceptance, which in my opinion is a requirement for ending the diet-binge cycle and feeling truly comfortable around food.

I worry that women are continuing to judge their food, their behaviors, and generally experiencing a lot of emotional deprivation on account of their weight loss goals.

I worry that this way of thinking promotes the very dangerous and stigmatizing idea that one’s weight is an indicator of their mental health…when believe it or not, super happy, spiritually fulfilled and mentally healthful people come in all shapes and sizes.

I worry that women are being made to feel like failures when their attempts at improving their mental or spiritual health do NOT produce permanent weight loss. 

I worry that women are not doing the deep-level body image work that will ultimately free them, because they believe a magical-thinking solution will one day make them thinner.

Ultimately, I know that the New Age Thinking Diet is still an active attempt at body control, which could very well lead to frustration and rebellion (i.e. binge eating) in the long run.

If you’ve been told that thinness is a self-help-slogan-away and feel like you must be doing it wrong because permanent weight loss was not the result—please know you’re not alone, and there is another way to live…

Like this post? Sign up here for free weekly(ish) coaching emails.