Dear Isabel,

A lot of what you share about is what does NOT work in healing binge-eating and changing our relationship with food.

But I’m feeling really frustrated—if diets/food control aren’t the answer, then what DOES work??

I LOVE this question. So here it goes…drumroll please…

What “works” is developing body acceptance and authentic connection with ourselves and our desires, without having to subscribe to what other people tell us to do with our own bodies.

What “works” is radical acceptance of ourselves, our bodies, our food, our circumstances…without needing these things to look a certain way, or satisfy cultural mandates that are designed to oppress us.

Intuitive Eating offers some important tools for self-connection in the realm of food and eating (a helpful read, particularly for those overwhelmed by the idea of “not dieting”), but body acceptance and excavation of diet mentality is equally if not more critical to this process in the long run.

In other words, eliminating diet-mentality (what doesn’t work) IS the answer.

Instead of telling you what “to do” with food (when people telling you what to do with food is where this problem started), I’m going to challenge your existing limitations around food and body, so you can do whatever the hell you want without fear, self-judgment, or frantic rebellion (aka binge-eating).

After all, eating is a natural biological instinct—we don’t have to be taught how to do it—but many of us do need to be taught how to identify and resist toxic cultural messages that tell us our food and our bodies are unacceptable, as these messages do more than make us feel bad about ourselves…they dangerously interfere with our biological processes around food.

Binge-eating is just one of the many physical and psychological side effects of interfering with your instincts around food—instincts that, in the absence of dieting/restriction, are as natural to you as breathing or peeing. 

This all to say, you can think of my blogs as insights into the “de-brainwashing” process that needs to occur, so that your own authentic desires around food—whatever they may be—can be honored and exist peacefully without interference from a lifetime of diet-cultural-conditioning.

To be clear,

acceptance is the answer,
being yourself with food is the answer,
letting go of “what to do” IS the answer.

And I’m here to point out whatever oppressive internalized messaging is getting in the way of you believing, understanding or embodying that truth.

I hope that re-frames what we’re doing here.

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