Many of you think lack of willpower is your problem; that other people are “stronger” than you, and that if you could just muster up the motivation to resist food, you’d finally get your weight problem under control.
If you are truly an emotional eater, that is, if you feel an undeniable urge or pull to eating non-hunger related situations — guess what? Willpower ain’t gonna do shit for you.
Resisting (verb: to exert force in opposition)
is not a sustainable solution to overcoming emotional needs. Emotional drivers always beat out willpower in the long run.
When you’re uncomfortable in a given situation (whether that discomfort is driven by boredom, anxiety, loneliness, or even excitement), your brain WILL prioritize “dealing with” that discomfort (e.g. numbing out with food), regardless of how badly you want to stop eating.
Soooo what’s the answer you may be thinking?
Well, for starters, DEAL WITH YOUR SHIT. That is, identify and address the underlying emotional driver. If you’re stressed out, do something that relaxes you; if you’re tired, sleep; if you’re angry, talk to someone; if you feel like shit about your body, read this.
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I just care that you address them.
A client recently told me she was struggling not to eat over being tired. She had a new job and was running on 4-5 hours of sleep each night, when she really needs 8. She said, “I can’t help it, I just can’t stop eating when I’m tired.”
I asked her if she ever tried sleeping more.
We think that ending emotional eating is about finding ways to “not eat” over things.
but the thing is…
Whether or not you eat a cookie when you’re lonely doesn’t fucking matter — what matters is that you’re lonely.
Deal with that.
(And those are actual bags of clothes I’m throwing out this year).
I used to have drawers filled with clothes that didn’t fit me. Jeans, shirts, dresses, you name it. I would diet, work-out, or some days just pray to God that one day each piece would fit me again, that one day, things would be thinner (I mean better).
“Tomorrow, life will be great. Today, I’m just waiting around for tomorrow.”
Do you get it? Why this is a problem?
Every day you wish you were thinner than you are, is a day you’re not really living. (Tweet that shit)
And if you have articles of clothing in your bedroom that encourage this mentality, BURN THEM. Or give them to a Goodwill.
On a secondary note, every day you deny yourself of what you really want, because you’re not “thin enough,” is likely a day you’ll eat mass quantities of Macaroni and Cheese for no reason. SO FOR GOD’S SAKES GO ON THAT OKC DATE YOU’VE BEEN AVOIDING.
And I get it, Sometimes You Just Have a FAT Day…
I’ve written in the past about how to stop “feeling” fat, but sometimes ya just do, and ain’t no affirmation gonna change that in a red hot second.
In these instances, the best thing we can say to ourselves is, “Okay, so I’m having a Fat Day…no biggie…this too shall pass.”
Don’t make it wrong. Don’t make it mean anything. Don’t give it too much power.
EVERYONE has bad body days. It’s not a big deal.